Perfectionism & Inflexibility

Specialized Therapy in Scottsdale, Arizona

When having high standards holds your child back.

Children and teens struggling with perfectionism avoid making mistakes at all costs. When they perceive they are making mistakes (or will make a mistake), perfectionistic children and teens experience intense anxiety, become angry or upset, and engage in behaviors to avoid real or imagined imperfection, such as:

  • Being overly cautious and extremely thorough

  • React in chaos when things don’t go perfectly or as expected

  • Attempt to make everyone else act perfectly or in a specific manner

  • Engage in rule-bound behaviors, such as being too rigid following game rules, tattle-telling on friends who break rules, or excessively planning out outings so they go exactly as expected

Children and teens who struggle with perfectionism have a strong belief that if they are less than perfect, they are failures. They tend to think in “black and white,” fear disappointing others, and may even engage in chronic procrastination that leads to increased anxiety and panic, resulting in an endless vicious anxiety loop.

Children and teens with perfectionism

Are often held back from success by their perfectionism, and often struggle with anxiety and depression

Often feel so terrified of failure that they may avoid learning new skills and instead, only stick to what comes easily to them

React intensely to small mistakes and criticize themselves harshly

Miss out on new opportunities or activities due to their fear of failure, which may lead to more social isolation

Frequently struggle to complete assignments and manage their time due to agonizing over trivial or minute details, leading to low academic achievement, feeling ashamed, and overwhelmed

We want you to know:

Let’s help your child turn perfectionism into growth.